Asking God for forgiveness

'I was born and raised a Christian. Grew up in a Christian household and went to church every Sunday. Around the age of 13 I began to struggle with lots of things, mental health, self harm, making bad choices. I went through some rough years and completely lost my relationship with God and couldn’t have been any further from him. I was angry at the world, angry at God. Last year, I was at the lowest point I’ve ever been in my life. My dad retired at the time and had questioned his timing, but told me it was in God's plan. Without my dad there to look after me, I wouldn’t be here. God knew I needed him.

I started to come back to church. Every week I would sit and cry. I felt so much guilt and shame, like I didn’t belong there. I thought I’d done too many bad things and I’d moved so far away from god that he couldn’t possibly love me anymore. Gradually, through hearing different preachings and going to events, speaking to people; I realised my mistakes are not written in stone. God still loves me, no matter what I’ve done. At awaken 2025, I had my salvation. I cried and dropped to my knees and begged God to forgive me for everything I’d done. On the 9th November 2025, I was baptised. I can see now that even when I thought god wasn’t there, he was. And even when I thought he didn’t love me, he did.' - Alice

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